Sunday, January 2, 2011

No Kiss Blogfest

Over at Frankie's blog she is hosting a No Kiss Blogfest, and since I love the built up tension that YA has a way of doing with almost-kiss scenes I knew I had to participate!

Originally I was going to post something from HOW TO DATE AN ALIEN, but now that it's in it's close to final revision stages and I'm searching for representation soon...I thought it would be better to start keeping that under wraps until it's found it's publishing home (

So instead I decided to share a little bit of this for fun project I've been working on called IMPERFECT (more info under my Writing tab).  To set the scene, Jay has just picked Lia up from school and they are back at his cabin, (keep in mind this is also the first draft!)


I think his bedroom was even bigger than my parents, so I figured it must have been the master. We were greeted by the bright afternoon sun that poured in through the floor to celing windows and French doors that led out to a huge balcony. I tried my best to notice everything, but the giant bed that sprawled across an entire wall and sat directly across from a large brick fire place. It looked like it could have been a scene from any girl's fantasy…if she wasn't wearing granny panties and not really sure if she had shaved her armpits that morning or not.

"Oh is that a kitchen in your bedroom?"

I quickly paced over to a large oak island that was equipped with a stainless steel stove and refrigerator.

"I think it's more of a wet bar than anything…" Jay slowly approached the bar, running his fingers over the granite counter top.

Did he really have to make a wet reference?

"Uh…so… this is where you stay? Pretty nice." I drummed my fingers on the counter top, trying to lean my body back as far as I could. I couldn't deny that I was attracted to him, okay I was really wanting to throw him down on his satin sheets, but I had to have some restraint and you can't just throw down a gold medalist. I saw him do that 360 too, he was a lot more flexible than me.

"Yeah we used to come over to Colorado all the time when I was a kid that's how I switched from skateboarding to snowboarding." He leaned against the counter, "So when coach said we should stay here awhile to train I couldn't resist."

He smiled, bumping his knees with mine. "And I heard they have pretty cute waitresses in this area."

"Nguhhhhhhhhh." Dangit, why did I always have to make that stupid noise.

"Are you hungry?" He went to the other side of the counter and knelt down. I guess he was trying to pretend like my weird noise never happened.

"I guess…" I leaned over the counter, trying to see what he was doing.

He popped back up and almost nailed me in the face with his dreadlocks.

"Oh..whoa…sorry about that." His face was just inches from mine. I could smell the oils in his hair and swore that I could even see his chapstick lines.

"I have S'mores pop tarts." He batted the box back and forth in his hands before setting it to the side of him.

"But I'm not sure how interested I am in them anymore…" He slowly slid around to the other side of the counter, so that he was facing me, toe to toe.

I couldn’t speak, I even had to focus just to make sure that I was breathing. I could literally feel the heat radiate off of him as he leaned into me. I really wanted to kiss him, but I didn't want to seem desperate and what if I did it wrong and got to sloppy and he made me walk home down the mountain? I gripped the counter behind me for support before he placed his hands on either side of mine.

"You know, Lia, you're definitely different than other girls that I've met back in California…" His words were practically a whisper.

"You probably say that to every girl that you bring back to your place…" I looked down, trying to not meet his eyes.

"No…" He slid his right hand down from the counter and let his fingers tip toe down till they reached the small of my back. He leaned his head to the side has he moved closer, I could feel his heart beating against mine and feel the vibration of his lips on my neck as he spoke. "That's actually the last thing I would say to another girl."

I felt his eyelashes flutter as he moved his head upwards so that I could almost taste his words.

You catholic girls start much too late, aw but sooner or later it comes down to fate.


Jay backed up as the vibrating of my phone jolted between us.


  1. Short but packs a punch! Loved the tension--could almost feel a vibrating phone at the end! Good luck with HOW TO DATE AN ALIEN!

  2. Oh. Yeah.

    Jay sounds like tons of boys I've met, so that's great on your part--he's believable and relatable. Also relatable is Lia's "what if I do it wrong?" concern. And that tension at the end? Again: Oh. Yeah.

    Oh, and HOW TO DATE AN ALIEN??? Best. Title. Ever!

  3. I loved her voice! Her agony about kissing him and whether she shaved...haha. Really great!

  4. I love her voice!! This was refreshing to me. Great job. One of my favorite lines: if she wasn't wearing granny panties and not really sure if she had shaved her armpits that morning or not.
    That totally made me laugh b/c I think every woman has had this thought!

  5. AHAHAHA. Yes. :) Thanks for that, girlmance!

  6. This was great! I loved her inner dialogue here :) And he seems super swoon-worthy. LOVED his last line. Great job and thank you for sharing!

  7. Grazie all for the words of encouragement!

  8. They were both really relatable and I adored them both. Lia was hilarious with her thoughts. I definitely like her. I wish I could read more!

  9. Ahh, the phone interruption. Works well in the contemporary setting and types of characters used. I like what you have here. She is funny; an interesting character to read which doesn't always happen with inner monologue type postings.

  10. I love how you used the setting to push up the tension. My favorite part was her worry that she'd kiss him wrong and have to walk down the mountain...too funny!
    Edge of Your Seat Romance

  11. Oh granny panties! HAH! And shaved armpits and cell phone interuptions. Man, can a girl get a break? Love how you set this up:-) Also thank you so much for participating in the fest!

  12. hahaha! That interruption with those lyrics was perfect. I love how you describe their face off, with his hands on either side of hers, almost caging her in. Great tension!

  13. Good luck with HOW TO DATE AN ALIEN and submission!

    I loved seeing her internal thoughts here. They were so real, and it just added to the build-up you created. Great job ^_^

  14. I so like this excerpt. It's nice to see what a girl is thinking when a guy moves in for the KISS....

    I didn't think she was thinking that .... lol

    Great Job, Magan.

    I've got the male pow in my excerpt .... check it out if you get a chance...


  15. This was a great piece, even if I don't know how to identify with the super smooth male character. Awkward, tongue tied bumbling home spun, on the other hand, I can manage!! Loved Lia's voice.

    :Dom (My No Kiss)


You should leave me a comment. It would probably make me smile and then I will probably comment back. Unless you are a spambot. Then I will probably just ignore you.